two thoughts of the day, plus another

erste (first)

i saw a calender today in the shop for 2009.  i will be missing new years eve.  not a big deal.  but still something strange to think.  i'll also miss a friends wedding the day after.  best wishes kaleigh.

zweite (second)

i watched an episode of monk today about christmas.  i'll also miss christmas.  that one is a bit deeper cutting, but still i can handle.  it will be great honestly.  since this thought is pretty much the first one, let's open it up a little:

to be honest, i feel a bit timid about setting my roots here.  during the bible study we had tonight i realized that i could definitely live here forever, no problem.  sure i'd miss family and some american things, but i'd love it here.  then i realized i could love to live in Steinheim (where i was a couple years ago).  or to live in manhattan where i have a solid job already (actually two if i want, plus i could get any number more, and go to an easy school and have lots of close friends, blah blah).  or i could live in wichita where most my family is and opportunity abounds.  or africa; i have some friends there.  or i could go live anywhere else in the world (probably under the radar, but whatev).

so i think to myself, "why here."  well, right now, i believe it's the right place.  honestly the need for strong christians is greater than in america, i.e. there are fewer here.  the need for sure is equal everywhere, but fewer are here.

i was thinking about that though, as i pondered being ok with missing christmas.  simply put, i could live anywhere, so why here?

.jrs.

plus another

i always stay up to late.  emails, posts, reading, skype, whatev.  it's hard to just go to sleep.

.goodnight.

the beauty of the fall

if you live anywhere with seasons, you don't have to look far now for beauty.  just walking around town is a sight for me these days.

some of you asked me about the temperature difference from home to Jena.  it's colder here.  dunno for sure why (well, yes i do, it's farther north by 13 degrees), but i do know i could use another sweater.

we went on a walk saturday.  by walk i mean a small hike.  it was great.  i was reminded of those time lapse shots you see on planet earth (worst link ever, i know, but it took me too long to just find this, so deal with it.  jk, but seriously) or something of the forests changing color.  it really is beautiful to see.

the world around us may not be perfect, sometimes it hurts, but maybe its the familiarity that makes it so astounding.  maybe more it's a glimpse of what we could be, what we should be.

.jrs.

tomorrow i take an entrance exam of sorts to the german class i'll be taking.  it should go well (it will).  step one to settling in: create a schedule and build new friendships.

i watched the first debate last night

i still can't decide who to vote for.  more importantly, i'm wondering it's importance.

i know it is important, but i really have a hard time holding faith in government.  will we ever see a system not designed to fatten the fat but rather honestly serve in the way it is designed to?  i do not think so.  every so often i have fancies of joining politics and being a part of a change to honest government, but i am never sure if it is even possible.

rocco has said his point of view to me a couple times, and it makes some sense.  he holds that governments in the end do not matter, because there will come a day when the fullness of God's kindom will change all things and make them whole again.  if we believe this, maybe we can rest in the fact that even though our world is fallen and falling apart it will ultimately be ok.

he's still going to vote.  i'm going to vote.  for whom? i am not yet sure.

.jrs.

what a trip

I am here in Jena, but it wasn't easy.  If an adventure is measured by things going wrong, I think mine would

be just big enough for me. 

In Chicago, US Airways had two gates they listed as departing from, F10 and F8.  My ticket said F10.  All

of the displays said F8.  Neither said they were going to Philadelphia (my next stop), but i was a couple 

hours early, so i didn't pay it much attention.

I went around looking for outlets to charge my phone and get a couple last calls in.  That was easy enough, but

it took me around the concourse a bit.  Then i sat and waited where the displays said to, F8.  Looking out

the window, it was easy to see that F8 was not usable, but i wrote it off.  I figured they could extend

the walkway over all the carts and such.  Time passed and eventually I looked at a guy's watch.

11:15.  My plane left at 11:30.  Something was wrong.  So I got up and walk around the corner to hear the

final boarding call and just get on in time.  I had some goofy tickets too, so it took a second longer at the gate.

What luck I had to look at the guy's watch.

From there, Philadelphia was fine.  Plugged my self in a bit more and called the fam.  Internet still

wasn't free or technically available (that should really be a priority for every airport to have free,

quality wifi for everyone).  so leaving the States could hardly have been easier.

I arrive in Frankfurt tired from the flight (i had an empty seat next to me, but still couldn't sleep).

We all get off and take a shuttle bus to the terminal.  No problem.  My bags are checked through, so all

I have to do is get my way to the next plane.  I walk around and suddenly see the check in area.  It's like

we just got in the airport.  Whatev.  So i wait in a line for a couple minutes.  Wrong line.  So i try

somewhere else, wrong again, but they tell me better where to go.  Still can't find it, so i ask the next

person, bingo.  Finally i get to the Transfer Check-in.  Easy goes it till the lady says, "Oh, you better

hurry.  They are boarding your flight now."

What?  So i hustle through an unnecessarily slow security checkpoint and run down the terminal.  Gladly,

I get to my gate with a small line waiting, so i take a breath, grab a drink from the fountain, and wait.

Again I get a great seat and start to nap away.  

At this point, I am starting to crunch the numbers for my getting to the train on time.  I come up with 80

minutes from landing to train leaving.  Should be do-able: 20-30 minutes waiting for bag, 5 for the bus, 30

minutes through the city, leaving a couple minutes to wait for the train.

But our plane leaves late.  I start thinking I can do it, but just barely.  Get to the train as it leaves.

Then we circle Berlin for about twenty extra minutes due to some computer glitch.  As we fly around over the

white tundra of cloud cover, I begin to doubt my chances.  As soon as we land, I'm ready to bolt.  I'm quick

off the plane.  I follow the crowd through one set of doors and the next.

I keep following the crowd till I'm just about at the street. What? Where's the baggage claim?  Everything 

looks like check in.  So I go ask.  Apparently I went one step too far and missed the baggage claim.

So i walk around a bit to find the Lost and Found.  They send me down the hall, outside, down the stairs,

and to the shady little building for lost baggage.  If you want to smuggle stuff into Berlin, forget your bag

and skip customs by going out the entrance.  I saw at least three people do that.  

After waiting over an hour and a half (that would be 90 of my then 50 minutes to catch the train), my bag

arrives.  Quickly through customs.  Man i packed a lot of junk.  Try walking around a place you've only

been through once, briefly, with three heavy bags, and without a clue where to go.  I saw all these buses,

and i knew i needed one, but which one I couldn't tell.  Finally i break down and go ask the information desk.

Perfect.  Three minutes till the bus leaves for the train station.  Hop on (didn't have to pay, i dunno why but

the past two times i offer money at the front and the driver looks at me like i'm crazy and tells me to just

get on.  maybe he couldn't break a 10, i dunno.  i dont care, free ride.) and ride to the station.  I freak out

a bit because they say we're their one light before we get to the stop.  Look like a dummy trying to get off 

the bus early.  

I know from there I'm ok, I just have to figure out what train to catch.  Sure enough, the guy at the travel

center tells me my ticket is flexible and I can catch the train to Jena leaving in fifteen minutes.  Awesome.

Enough time to call Rocco so he isn't waiting two hours on me.  Wrong.  The train is early, and I'm not sure I have

change for the phone (which i ended up having 11.70 of when i counted later)  So i get on the train, not wanting to miss it,

sit myself down and rest.  The two seats i try to sit in happened to have been reserved, but it's hardly a problem.

I just act confused (easy enough) and scoot over.  What a smooth dream of train, too.  I wanted to stay awake to help

with jet lag, but i couldn't have said my name let alone sit still on a smoothly rumbling ride without dozing off.

Two hours late(r), I get off the train thanks to the guy next to me who points out in my stupor it was my stop.

Get off to see Rocco down the way.  

What a great trip!  Seriously, it was fun.  And now I'm here.  To be honest, it hasn't fully connected that

I'm living here for the next seven months.  It just doesn't seem real.  Or maybe it just doesn't seem like 

that big of a deal.  But it is.  My mind is going about this so lazily, it's almost disturbing.

either way, here i am.  it's cold.  life is a bit strange still.  i'm tired.  and the road ahead of me is

long.  very long.  better get walking then.

.jrs.

garsh

i can get really tired  . . . and get nothing done.

t minus a little while until i leave and i need to tie up some ends.

now i need to sleep.

.jrs.

tick, tick, tock, how the time so passes

watch as we wait till the day will end.

i had the chance to sit down with martha smallwood at westlink today.  i knew it was going to be a good meeting, but i was surprised in the end with how peaceful i felt.  i wouldn't expect to leave a meeting with someone feeling at ease, but that's exactly what happened.

not only was i able to share where i've been, where i'm headed now, and how i could grow in the future, but i also felt challenged and encouraged through our entire discussion of what i will be doing and how westlink will be able to support me in whatever fashion.

to boot, we were able to sit down with a couple of ladies from the church who are faithful to pray weekly (and i'm sure more) for the body.  i've never thought much of anointing or praying blessings on others, but spending just the few minutes in prayer together was a treat.  the meaning of their words and the encouragement that filled me are hard to describe.

sometimes i sit anxiously, not sure if i will make it in jena (in many ways) or if it will really be the best thing for me now, but coming home from church tonight i felt a strong peace in my heart about the path i am on.

may i walk the path by the light i see.

.jrs.

changing winds

sometimes you can sit on a back porch on a nice day with a light breeze and see the soft tree limbs bounce back and forth.  the winds blow you one way a bit, and they pull you back a bit.  it's all a fun little game.

then the wind will pick up something fierce from a new direction, and with it rolls in a storm driving you off the porch to the living room inside.  

maybe that's how we see changing winds, as putting a damper on our plans.  we can also see them as driving us in new directions.  after all, could a sailor really sail without the wind behind him (well, yes, but not very fast).

this past week has left me a little winded to say the least.  just over two weeks from take off to Jena, I found out that the opportunity to work with one of my best friends down in Mexico was very real.  I all but cancelled my plane tickets and drove my self on down to Phoenix and beyond to live lovely Sonora, but I didn't.

I knew I needed to tap the breaks, if only ever so slightly, and get some advice.  I waited a bit and talked to my parents and some friends.  Then I talked to Rob Harris, director of Kontaktmission USA.  What he reminded me of has now become the wind in my sails to Germany.

It's pretty common when we as American Christians think of missions to first think of South America, Africa, or China.  These places, or places similar, are in obvious need.  They need houses built or wells dug or Bibles summgled in past oppressive governments.   In meeting their needs we can show them our love we've learned from Christ and bring them new hope and faith in him.  These works are all great, and most of us jump at the chance to go out and fill these needs or at least support those who can do so.

What we forget about are sometimes places much closer, if only in thought.  We forget a lot about our own communities, and that's a problem in itself, but who we seem to forget the most about are the millions of men and women living well over in Europe.  We see their wealth and high culture, and we write of the need.  The sad thing is they usually see their wealth and high culture and write themselves off as well.  With all their things, they don't need God anymore.  But they do.

I know the needs of the world can be met in so many ways, but I also believe they should all be met as much as possible.  With so many people working in the third world, I can hardly justify moving myself their.

Personally, I know that I am uniquely able to serve in Jena with this church where many others would not be able.  For this reason, I set myself to go.

Who's going with me?

.jrs.